WHAT TO SEE:
If you like museums, the De Young always has traveling exhibits. The Modern Art Museum will thrill fans of twentieth century art. Should ships be your fancy, check out the Maritime Museum. Of course, Alcatraz makes for a fascinating day, and nature lovers will appreciate Angel Island. The Embarcadero now has an observation deck on its top floor that offers an impressive view of the Bay Area.
WHAT TO DO: Nightlife gadflies should check out the huge obnoxious clubs in SOMA, or South of Market. This area, once full of rotting warehouses, has changed for one simple reason: economics. There is simply nowhere else to build. Sports fans are anticipating the opening of Pacific Bell Park, home of the Giants. If you are brave enough to drive, cross the Golden Gate Bridge and explore nearby Sausilito and Tiberon. San Francisco is a city of neighborhoods, so explore them: the quirky Haight, quaint Noe Valley, bustling Chinatown, rebellious North Beach, the pretentious Marina, stately Pacific Heights, the flamboyant Castro, the Third World Tenderloin, the mighty Financial, and the friendly Richmond. Oh, and shopping. There's some of that in San Francisco. Every gaudy store you can imagine is in or near Union Square. Macy's, which at one time was bankrupt, is a grand big city department store that has good sales. My sister has gone to the Esprit Outlet for years (900 Minnesota Street, 415-648-6900) and if you're lucky you'll find some good deals. If you need your shoes shined, go to A Shoeshine and Company in the Crocker Galleria, on 50 Post Street, just off of Market. Nicole will spiff them up in no time, while talking your ear off and explaining the virtues of being an alcoholic, how the worst day of her life was her first AA meeting, and how being sober sucks. You'll look proper and indulge in fine conversation at the same time.
WHAT NOT TO DO:
Don't expect a balmy day during the summer or a frigid day in the winter. You just never know. Wear a light jacket because the wind will chill your bones if it picks up. I would not advise driving into San Francisco unless you're familiar with the streets, and besides, parking is at a premium, and the police are vigilant about enforcing the codes. My co-worker had a nightmarish experience when she had her car towed, so drive to a BART station, or if you're staying with someone in the Peninsula or Santa Clara County, take CalTrain to San Francisco. You can also get to "The City" from Oakland by ferry. People love Fisherman's Wharf, which blows my mind. It offers great views of the bay, but the stores are tacky, the food poor and overpriced, and consider selling a kidney if you want to park. There are so many other vibrant areas that deserve your visit. Oh, and if you go to Chinatown and decide to buy a live animal for dinner, do not take it on the bus. The city passed an ordinance prohibiting the trafficking of live animals on any bus or train. I've twice heard a story about how a woman on the Stockton #30 bus stomped on a chicken's neck to kill it because it was making too much noise. So don't worry, you won't have such an experience.
WHERE TO EAT: Eating is a must when you're here, and if you eat at a fast food restaurant, you should be tarred, feathered, and run out of town. What's amazing is that although San Francisco has one of the highest costs of living in the United States, eating out won't break the bank. You won't notice a lot of chain restaurants except in tacky areas like Fisherman's Wharf. The natives accept chain stores with the warmth of the Taliban welcoming an all-girls Catholic school. The Richmond is full of ethnic eateries, from Armenian to Vietnamese. Great Mexican and Salvadorian can be found in the Mission, the Haight offers the gamut from Cajun to Cuban, and of course, Italian dominates North Beach. I can't tell you all the good places to eat: listing restaurants in San Francisco is like listing Bank of America branches . . . there are too many. My favorites are Cha Cha Cha, a Cuban restaurant in the Haight, and Basta Pasta, an Italian treat in North Beach. Other recommended places are Bocce, on Green Street, and Rose Pistola, a family style restaurant in the same district. Get the "chicken under a brick." Nearby is Café Sport, another family style Italian joint that is more casual that the Rose Pistola and has more of a North Beach feeling. In Chinatown, House of Nanking on Kearny Street, near Columbus Street, is a must, famous for its Nanking sauce. If you want something simple, Molinari's, on Columbus, has been around for ages and has great sandwiches: Joe's Special is to die for. However, you must remember to grab your own roll or the staff will snarl at you. Prudente on Grant Street is also a fine deli. If you crave caffeine, Café Trieste has great coffee, pastries, and live music; well, don't expect grunge: it's Italian folk music, and on Sundays, opera. Café Roma on Columbus has great coffee as well. For a drink, Zam Zam's on Haight Street is a hoot. You must order a gin martini, cause the bartender won't make you anything else, and if there are no seats available, he won't let you in. If you've got a fat wallet and desire an unforgettable dining experience, Tommy Toy's, on Montgomery Street across from the Transamerica Building, is a French Asian fantasy. The prix fix meal, all seven courses, running about fifty bucks a person, will delight you with its impeccable service and phenomenal food. Finally, if you only have a few bucks, you can get a good slice of pizza at Blondie's in Union Square.
WHERE TO STAY:
If you're on a budget, you've got a couple decent hostels. There's one hostel near Union Square (415-788-5604, 312 Mason Street, sfdowntown@norcalhostels.org), and another in Fort Mason (415-771-7277, Fort Mason Building 240, sfhostel@dnai.com). If you have a generous expense account, you won't have a problem. Should you arrive from overseas and book a hotel through your agent, make sure they place you in a decent neighborhood! Neighborhoods that are "iffy" are the Tenderloin, Hunter's Point, the Western Addition, Portrero Hill, and anything on Market Street south of Sixth.